Women

I love women. They come in different shapes and sizes and they are just a marvel to look at. Don’t get me wrong I am not a lesbian but I appreciate women and their roles in society, no matter how big or how small.

So I really could not understand why a few women find it easy to be home wreckers. They are worth so much more than a little meat on the way, but somehow somewhere something goes wrong and a few women find it easier to cheat with other women’s husbands/boyfriend/partners. While I cannot claim to understand the laws of human nature, I can say that I still understand rights and wrongs. There is only white and black. There is no such thing as grey or the in between colors. 

Coming from an all-girls school this is sometimes an all too common problem, not only do we hear about it we sometimes experience it personally.  Some friendships are broken beyond repair and yes I know some of you reading this can relate to it.  You think that’s worse, what about the heartache that results from this traumatic experience; she is stressed out and cries her eyeballs out. At the end of the day girls lose their self-esteem and their trust in people because the people closest to her who is supposed to have her best interest at heart are the same people that betray her.

“My best friend who I went to high school with slept with the father of my baby,” said Selita Bobo.

“I did not understand why she did that, neither did I understand why he would go to court to tell the judge why he should not pay child maintenance,” she said.

Now although this woman is independent and has a good job with the government, one can still see how she has trust issues with men and everyone around her.

She is now also a single mum supporting her baby girl.

I do not understand how these kinds of things happen all the time, especially here in Fiji, where we profess to go to church and know what is right or wrong. Maybe I am naive who knows.

Apart from all those small issues, let us look at some of the strong women I have seen these past months. Some women fish from the sea and sell them on the mainland. They are the source of income to their household. After coming back from a long day of fishing, they then have to come and cook the food again on firewood and then prepare dinner for her kids and her husband. Where are the men, then?

They are at the ‘vale ni koro’ drinking kava with the rest of the men. I have seen this occur more often than I would like. The cycle continues and it’s usually a never ending one.

Women who live near the sea do this quite often. I have traveled to so many villages and I see women working from the morning till the night, it makes me feel that we are still living during the pre-contact period. They make me feel as if I am not doing enough for my people, for me.

These women I always think are struggling, the in actual truth is that it the only way of life they seem to know and understand quite well. 

Women are beautiful creatures. I heard a saying once

The woman came from a man’s rib. Not from his feet to be walked on. Not from his head to be superior to, but from the side to be his equal. Under the arm to be protected, and next to the heart to be loved.

I thought it summed it well. I wish that women would see themselves as much worthy than they do themselves. They give birth to children. They stay not only for that 9 months but even through the late nights when she changes your diapers, or feeds you breakfast lunch and dinner. All that and she still has time and some sort of encouragement for you before you go to bed.

Many have made it without men for years. So in this say and age I see a lot of comments from girls son their walls saying “I can’t live without you”, and issues of that sort, I just think is a little not quite right. Some are even suicidal over it. I really do not get this. Maybe I will get it after I really try to understand more.